The decompression protocol — getting out of a too-dense day

Why a protocol

When you come home from a too-full day — endless meeting, packed commute, a conversation that drained you, conflict, prolonged social stimulation — your nervous system needs to return to baseline. Not in 6 hours. Not tomorrow. Now.

The classic trap: you come home, grab your phone, scroll “to decompress”, 2 hours later you’re more exhausted than before, you go to bed, and burnout settles in. Scrolling is NOT decompression, it’s passive stimulation.

The protocol below takes 30 minutes, no equipment, no special conditions. You can do it at the office in an empty room, on the way home, or as an end-of-day ritual. It’s inspired by DBT distress-tolerance techniques ^[3] and the strategies described by autistic people interviewed by Raymaker ^[1] .

Step 1 — Cut the input (5 min)

Goal: lower the noise. No more, no less.

• Close the door of your space. If you don’t have one, put on headphones with no music, or earplugs.
• Phone on airplane mode or leave it in another room. Not “silent”. Airplane.
• Turn off all bright lights. Keep one soft source (low lamp, candle, dimmed natural light).
• If you’re wearing clothes that scratch, change. Pyjamas, blanket, dressing gown.
• Drink a big glass of water.

You have NOTHING else to do. No “I’ll just check my emails”. This step is an active decision to unplug.

Step 2 — Discharge the body (10 min)

Goal: turn the tension stored in the body into movement.

ADHD/AuDHD people store enormous body tension during masking and cognitive effort. If you skip this step, the tension will release at night (insomnia, contractions, nightmares) or tomorrow (irritability, fatigue from morning).

Choose ONE of these options based on your energy:

• Fast walk 10 min outside. No phone. No destination.
• Gentle yoga stretches (YouTube: “Yoga With Adriene 10 min unwind”).
• Free stimming: rock, tap your feet, twirl, do what needs to come out. Nobody’s watching, it’s your body speaking.
• Hot shower or bath. Heat activates the parasympathetic system.
• Cold water on face and wrists (DBT TIPP technique, effective against acute dysregulation).

This is NOT sport. It’s a mechanical release.

Step 3 — Feed ONE sense (10 min)

Goal: restore a positive sensation, no competing inputs.

The key rule: one sensory channel at a time. No Netflix with snack and phone. ONE sense, full attention.

Some options depending on your profile:

• Hot drink slowly. Herbal tea, tea, hot chocolate. Hold the cup, feel the warmth, the scent, the taste. That’s the entire occupation.
• Calm music, headphones or soft speaker, doing nothing else. Lying down or sitting with eyes closed.
• Texture: stroke an animal, handle clay, plunge hands into rice, massage your feet.
• Paper reading of a book you already know (no novelty, no cognitive effort). 5-10 pages.
• Free drawing with no goal. Doodles, mandala, dry pastels.
• Hot bath with Epsom salts + soft light (combines touch + heat).

Common error: picking an activity that wants to be calm but stacks (watching a film + socials + snacking). One thing. At a time.

Step 4 — Short check-in (5 min)

Goal: exit the protocol on a note of awareness.

Note quickly, on paper or phone (not in your head, which forgets):

1. How do I feel NOW (1-10) vs on arrival (1-10)?
2. One sentence on what happened today that drained me?
3. One thing I can put down for tomorrow (pack a bag, lay out an outfit, a message to send on arrival)?

No more. No mandatory gratitude journal, no long meditation. Just: aware that you did something for yourself.

Express variant (10 min)

When you don’t have 30 min but you can feel it heating up:

• 1 min: put phone down and isolate (step outside for 30 sec if possible)
• 3 min: 4-7-8 breathing (3 cycles)
• 5 min: lukewarm shower OR walk
• 1 min: big gulp of water, tell yourself quietly “I did what I could”

Respiration guidée

Inspire 4s, retiens 7s, expire 8s. Calme le système nerveux. Utile en cas de tempête émotionnelle ou RSD.

4-7-8Box breathing (4-4-4-4)Cohérence cardiaque (5-5)

Inspire par le nez

4

Commencer0 cycles complétés

When the protocol isn’t enough

If you run this protocol every day and still feel more and more empty, it’s probably a signal of installed autistic burnout, not a bad day. Read next:

• Autistic burnout
• Masking — the invisible effort
• Preparing a psychiatrist consultation

Takeaways

• Scroll isn’t decompression. It’s passive stimulation that worsens burnout.
• 4 steps: cut the input (5) → discharge the body (10) → feed a single sense (10) → short check-in (5).
• Adapt to your sensory profile: hypersensitive vs hyposensitive.
• Do it every day after a saturated day — don’t wait for the crash.
• If you still exhaust yourself despite the protocol, it’s burnout — not a discipline failure.

Going further

• Autistic burnout — understanding and recovering
• Masking — the invisible effort of passing as neurotypical
• Toolbox — interactive exercises
• Decompression AFTER masking — extended version